The Lighter Side

While we have no actual proof, journalists claim these headlines were printed in the newspapers:

Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers

Panda mating fails: Veterinarian takes over

Lung cancer in women mushrooms

Teacher strikes idle kids

Squad helps dog bite victim

Miners refuse to work after death

Juvenile Court to try shooting victim

Deer kill 17,000

Kids make nutritious snacks

Arson suspect held in Massachusetts fire

Ban on soliciting dead in Trotwood

Lansing residents can drop off trees

High School dropouts cut in half

Hospitals are sued by 7 foot doctors

Sex education delayed, teachers request training

Shot off woman's leg helps Nicholas to 66

Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted

Something went wrong in jet crash, expert says

Air head fired

Drunk gets nine months in violin case

Altar and Rosary Society presents Pornography on the Internet

Two Soviet ships collide, one dies.